5.24.2012

Incoming Advice


This is another post in the expecting and parenthood series :)

When you're pregnant you may intentionally seek advice about caring for your upcoming bundle of joy, or you may be given advice without requesting. Regardless, you will know what's right for you.

I posted this post when the twins were home. Brent and I had new-parent anxiety. We didn't know if we were doing it right, and we wanted to. The truth is, there is no right that fits perfectly for everyone! We were doing things right, but we needed confirmation. As long as you make a decision that you feel confident is best for you and your family, it will be the right one.

{They were about 2.5 months here.}

Since I was expecting twins, when I was pregnant I immediately reached out to moms of multiples. I'm forever thankful to them. I'm glad I reached out to real people who had experienced things I knew would be in my future. However, some of them did things differently than I chose to. There is nothing wrong with having a difference in opinions or wondering if you will do things right. It's human nature. It will come to you--your choice, that is.

I bought books. I didn't finish one of them. I read bits and pieces of most, but there were so many parts I felt like I already knew. For several years before having my first baby, I felt my 'job' was to be a mom. I thought I needed job training, but I didn't. There is no training manual for a baby, although there are some very helpful guides.

I did seek out advice from Moms on Call, and I know, without a doubt, it gave me all the confidence I was lacking. I knew what I was doing, but I needed someone to tell me to do it. I wanted someone to tell me to give my twins a routine before they gave me one. They have thrived on it, and as a family, it's been so pleasurable.

When someone gives you advice, remember it. Don't plan to use it all. You won't. At times, you will worry that you should, but you will know. You will know which advice to revert back to. I think as moms we want to help. We want to help our kids and other moms. Therefore, giving advice can come easy. I want to give advice if it will help someone. I want to give advice if someone asks for it. It doesn't hurt my feelings if people don't take my advice, because I know what worked for me will simply not work for everyone. I'm fine with that. Thankfully, I knew this as people were giving me advice.

When you want advice, ask! I cannot tell you how THANKFUL I am for other moms and social media. I know who I am as a parent and I know my babies like no one else. However, I haven't the slightest clue about baby eczema or other random things that pop up. Some other moms? They do! Why? They've been there! I don't hesitate for a second to send a tweet to ask for advice or help. I've learned a lot and it's helped us lots.

Just remember, advice may always be incoming. You don't have to take it, but remember it. Ask when you need it! It doesn't change who you are as a parent. It helps you grow as a parent, whether it's advice you use or not.

Check out the Huggies Mommy Answers Facebook app and find more posts from bloggers sharing their experiences of motherhood on the Huggies page on BlogHer.com.
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6 comments :

  1. Beautifully said Megan! It is a shame that babies don't come with a "How To" manual. It is a hard, scary job but I finally learned each child is different and have to be dealt with differently. Only advice I can give is to love them and try your best!

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  2. Great post! And a great reminder to all those new moms and expecting moms!

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  3. Love this post! All so true!

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  4. I'm so glad I have friends like you to turn to with questions!

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  5. I'm expecting now. And for the advice I have sought, I appreciate 100%. And social media has been an awesome place to find advice from like-minded people! :)

    The only advice I haven't appreciated is actually from family members who feel they can say whatever they want, unfiltered.

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