First of all, thank you all so much for the birthday wishes (comments, tweets, texts, calls, etc.) yesterday….as well as all the other nice words. We appreciate it so much. It really touches us to hear you all still think of him. I’m sure he was flattered by all of the birthday wishes. We feel so blessed and knowing he touched so many lives means that much more to us. We will never forget him and I hope others don’t either.
I did a post of pictures yesterday for his first birthday.
For Cohen’s first birthday, we ideally would have gone to a baseball game. I posted here about our idea to still travel to the stadiums as we had planned to thinking Cohen would be here. Well, since I’m pregnant with Cohen’s brother and sister, traveling, heat and sitting at baseball games was out of the question for now.
Yesterday, Brent and I both stayed home from work. I must say, I think this helped tremendously. Being together, that is. I think we both woke up pretty sad, but we decided to go to breakfast and get out for a bit before it got too hot.
We went to the best donut shop in town. I thought it was a sweet sign they had baseball donuts 🙂
After a bit we picked up some movies and decided to head back home.
We did lots of thinking and talking about our Cohen.
I don’t think about we tried to think or talk about his last day specifically, though that is when the above picture was taken.
I think a lot about the first time I saw him….
In case you are a new reader right now, or even yesterday, the shortest possible way for me to explain….Our baby boy had congenital heart defects. He was born a year ago, yesterday. He faced a major open heart surgery and several other small ones. At 12 days old, he got a tear in his trachea and went to heaven in his mommy and daddy’s arms. His medical staff spoke constantly about what a fight he put up daily. He was a tough little guy and we miss him dearly. You can read more here.
Over the past few days, we received several beautiful flower arrangements from my best friends and our family. Flowers are my favorite so I loved having them around us 🙂
For dinner last night, we went to one of our favorite places. I think we both knew if we didn’t get out some yesterday, we would lay in bed and sulk and we really didn’t want to do that since we were celebrating Cohen’s birth.
We ended the night with a little birthday cupcake in which Brent and I blew out the candle together.
I didn’t want to go to sleep because it kind of made me sad that his first birthday was ending.
Naturally, I had thoughts of Cohen’s first birthday party. The first birthday party was something I had always looked forward to. Brent and I figured a party would be too hard now, and of course, not the same. We decided to do a small family get together instead. We had discussed inviting all of our friends as well, but there were so many people we wanted to invite, we were afraid it would turn into more than we could handle. So, on Saturday, some of our family that was in town came over. Brent cooked up a bunch of food on the grill and it was a nice time. I didn’t go with any specific theme, because I figured that whole “too much” feeling would hit. The hardest part was the cake part. Though, I was so thankful we got it. We got candles, but decided before everyone came over that we wouldn’t emotionally be able to handle doing them. I wanted to take a picture of us with the cake and when we were posing Brent said “Am I supposed to smile? Isn’t this a sorrowful moment?” I started to lose it. He was right. It was bittersweet. We were celebrating his birth, but just devastated he wasn’t here with us. We made it through a picture….
We had about 15-20 people and it was perfect. As far as entertainment, our nephew, Beaux, probably gets that title, haha….
On Sunday, Brent took BT and went to a baseball game with his dad. He texted this picture to me….
We took BT to his first game, posed here, last September.
I’m sure Cohen had fun celebrating his first birthday 🙂 I know we will be thinking of him non-stop over these next few weeks. I anticipate the 18th being another hard day, but hopefully it won’t be so bad.
Hope you all are having a good week!
***I have teamed up with BlogHer to give someone a $100 Best Buy gift card!! Go here to enter 🙂